So I came back from my holiday, went for a scan, and then later in the week there was a whole load of last minute fucking about that made me wonder — yet again —  how on earth anyone who doesn’t work for themselves does this.

The call at about 4pm on a Thursday went something like this:

“So your bloods suggest that you might be near ovulating so can you do an ovulation test and then call us back with the results? If you are, you’ll have to have the egg collection tomorrow and we’ll have to work out what time you do the Ovitrelle tonight, and if you’re not then it will be on Saturday and if it’s on Saturday you’ll have to stay up until quarter to 1 tonight and do the Ovitrelle injection, but you also need to do the Cetrotide injection when you get home tonight, oh and start taking the Indomethacin straight away but don’t take it on an empty stomach. Anyway, just call us back when you’ve done the ovulation test.”

Did you follow all that? I mean seriously, thank fuck it was my sixth cycle because otherwise I’d have probably started crying. As it was I was between meetings, so I went to Boots, bought a load of ovulation sticks, used one and then sat in a hotel loo cubicle for ten minutes to be absolutely sure that, as I suspected, I wasn’t ovulating. I wasn’t. Then I went and sat in a cafe and force fed myself food I didn’t want so I could take the Indomethacin. And obviously when I called the clinic to tell them I wasn’t ovulating, the person I needed to talk to wasn’t there and didn’t call me back before my next meeting.

And then I got the out of hours message, called the out of hours phone… and nobody answered. And then I got an email telling me to do the Cetrotide “this evening” and the Ovitrelle at 12.45am. And then I realised there was a slight problem as I wasn’t going to be in until 11pm and didn’t have any Cetrotide secreted about my person.

So having failed to raise anyone by phone I replied to the email, explained the Cetrotide issue, and said “is this going to be a problem?” and I got a response. But the response was “I would say that you need to take it a bit earlier, but if you are not home, we cannot do much.” WHICH WAS REALLY FUCKING UNHELPFUL especially when I didn’t get a reply to my email where I asked if it would interfere with the Ovitrelle and whether I should change my plans. And then didn’t get a reply to the text message I sent to the out of hours phone.

So I thought fuck it (my plans involved seeing a friend who was over from Australia for one night only) and went out.