You might recall that in posts past I’ve bitched about the lack of publicity given to women who don’t have children given that there are meant to be so bloody many of us. Well clearly it’s like buses – you wait ages then blah, blah, blah (god that’s a shit cliché, after all, everyone’s got an app on their phone that tells them when the bus is coming now so you don’t ACTUALLY wait ages…) I DIGRESS.
Two brilliant pieces in the national press in the last three days. One in The Times by Elizabeth Day (YES, it’s paywalled but good journalism costs money so pay for it, it’s worth it, she’s worth it, I PROMISE you) which is nominally about the rise of the new female bachelor, but is actually a very honest account of one woman who was a bit of a people-pleaser (which I slightly struggle to identify with) finding herself, via a failed marriage, IVF and a miscarriage. Which sounds very depressing but ultimately it’s really very uplifting.
(You should also read her Kindle Single short story, Babysitting. I read it shortly after I’d been freezing my eggs and I just knew it could only have been written by someone with first hand experience of IVF and Those Clinics.)
Then, today, in the Daily Mail, Claudia Connell writes about getting to the age of 50, having tried IVF on her own in her 40s and not succeeded, but now being very much at peace with the way that things have turned out. Now, as you might have noticed, I’m a born cynic. And I also believe that it’s human nature to reconfigure our history so that we can say that we’re glad that things turned out the way they did. (I totally get it, it’s self-preservation, how else would you get up in the morning every day if you lived a life that was full of regret?) So I’m always rather sceptical when people say things like they’re glad that IVF failed because otherwise X, Y, Z. But actually in her case I believe it. Whether you do or not, it makes a very interesting — and heartening — read.
So yay — women without children in the public eye, albeit having to write about why they’re women without children but y’know, baby steps and all that. (Can’t decide if that pun was intentional or not….)